Love in the AI Era

AI on dating apps has changed how we connect, offering many benefits. But there’s a downside to it too. Let’s explore the good, bad & ugly sides of it.


Today, it’s easy to find love with just a swipe on a dating app. Meeting someone special has never been simpler. In the digital age, dating apps use algorithms to help people find love. Swiping and matching on these apps often lead to modern love stories.

But behind the easy dating apps are complex algorithms and artificial intelligence (AI) that control how we find love. While roses are bought, chocolates are wrapped, and dinner plans are made, this article explores how AI is used on dating apps. We’ve explored the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of it.

Let’s look at the good

At the 2023 Code Conference, Bumble’s founder, Whitney Wolfe Herd, discussed how the app has used AI for moderation, recommendations, and photo verification. AI’s key advantage is matching people based on compatibility metrics and preferences. Algorithms analyze user data, like interests and location, to suggest matches aligning with each user’s unique criteria. This targeted approach increases the chance of finding a compatible partner, saving time and effort.

AI-powered features enhance user experience with personalized recommendations and improved match quality over time. Machine-learning algorithms adapt to user behavior, refining suggestions based on interactions. This process ensures more relevant matches, fostering meaningful connections and reducing profile browsing frustration.

AI-driven chatbots and virtual assistants improve communication between users. They offer prompts to start and maintain conversations, easing social anxiety and enabling smoother interactions, especially for introverts. By enhancing communication, AI helps users engage confidently, fostering genuine connections and intimacy.

Now the bad

AI on dating apps has some problems. One big issue is bias and unfair treatment. AI uses data to make decisions, but this data can be biased, like favoring certain races. This can make unfair stereotypes stronger and treat people unequally. Also, AI can focus too much on looks, not personality.

Using dating apps can sometimes feel shallow. They can make dating like a game, where people are judged quickly based on their looks. This can make people seem like objects, not real people. People who date online often feel less happy and secure in their relationships compared to those who date offline.

The ugly & artificial

The biggest worry with AI on dating apps is how it can be misused. As algorithms get smarter, scammers also get better at tricking people. Users can fall victim to various scams, from fake profiles to attempts to steal personal information. According to Arkose Labs, there was a huge 2,087% increase in bot attacks on dating apps between January 2023 and January 2024.

There are also privacy concerns. Dating apps collect a lot of personal data, like what you like, your messages, and where you are. This information can be used for targeted ads or sold to others without your permission. This lack of privacy can make users feel exposed and less trusting.

Lastly, using AI to match people raises questions about the role of technology in relationships. Can algorithms really understand human attraction and love, or do they just turn love into numbers? Relying too much on technology in dating could take away the spontaneity and excitement that makes love so special.

Dating sites are businesses, and their goal is to make money. While they’re meant to help you find love, they also profit from keeping you on their platform. They do this by selling upgrades and premium subscriptions. AI is used to make users spend more money and stay engaged with the app. It can determine how desirable someone seems and adjust their profile to increase or decrease their chances of getting matched. This helps create a bigger market for their premium features.

We want to help you be a smart digital citizen, especially when using dating apps. Here are some tips to avoid scams:

  • Take your time: Build a real connection and be cautious of anyone rushing you to share personal info.
  • Don’t send money: Scammers often ask for money using elaborate excuses.
  • Image search: Use Google Image Search to check if your match’s profile picture is real.
  • Check for consistency: Look for your match on social media. No presence or new profiles could be a red flag.
  • Video call: Verify your match’s identity with a video call.

To sum up

AI in dating apps has made finding love easier, but it also raises important questions. We need to be careful and make sure technology helps, not hinders, our search for love.

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